Today was one of those days. I don’t know if it was the full moon or not, but I was completely off. I was lethargic and didn’t really have the energy to make it through. I found myself dragging around from task to task. I’m so happy the day is over and I can crawl into my bed. Dullness aside, I spent a lot of time thinking. 

I thought about myself and how hypercritical I am of me, and how I’m constantly demanding that I be perfect. I thought about how I give so much to everyone and not enough to myself. I thought about my crush and wondered why he would ever fall for someone like me.

I can always give to people with no expectation, but find it hard to give to myself. I can accept people how they are, but can’t accept the way that I am. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate who I am; but I always think that I can be better. If anyone gives me a compliment, I always counter it by pointing out one of my many flaws. And when it comes to the crush, I look at him, look at me and other women and I think “there’s no way he’ll like me over so and so, they’re so much hotter than me.” 

I am my own worst enemy. I don’t know why I always sabotage myself. I’ve come a long way, but I still have some way to go. 

I finally told myself, that I’m not perfect, and that’s okay. I may not be the most beautiful girl in the world, but I am still beautiful, and I am very much worthy of love. It’s okay to take some time out for myself. It’s okay to be kind to myself. Even more when someone pays me a compliment a better response is to smile and say thank you. 

I’m slowly working out my kinks, man…but everyday I get one step closer to the center of myself. I’m okay with that. I’m okay with progressing. ❤️

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3 Comments Add yours

  1. I am you are and you can’t look through the the eyes of your crush and fill it with your perception. You don’t know what he finds beautiful and that might as well be YOU. A caring giving person that is not selfish and cares about others. Of course it needs to be in balance and you can only be good to others if you allow yourself to be good to you as well. It’s ok to aspire to high goals and have high standards for yourself but give yourself a break from time to time. The girl you are looking at while thinking that she is so much more beautiful than you, have you ever wondered what battle she is fighting? We all have them….hugs ❤️ be good to yourself

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You are absolutely right! I can’t dispute any of what you said. I really do need to be kinder to myself. I’m slowly getting better. And you’re so right, I really can’t assume what he may or may not think of me! Thank you for the kind words and vote of confidence! ❤️❤️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You are very welcome dear and I know you got this. You are beautiful in many ways. ❤️

        Like

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